pills

Anyone living in pain with be able to more than empathise with this one.

Throughout the day I take various fistful’s of tablets, my day starts with medication and ends with medication – my morning medications are taken in an attempt to prepare my body for the day ahead, but it’s the night time medications are the mega important ones for me because the correct cocktail of types of drug is the deciding factor in terms of sleep I manage to snatch which is important for so many reasons. The most important one for me is that the less sleep I get tends to determine how the following day will pan out MS symptoms wise. The issue is though, I am in pain 24 hours a day with my back having been in permanent spasm for the past couple of years. Pain is the main determining factor when it comes to sleep for me. Then the great migration from bed to sofa begins.

The great migration for me tends to occur any time from 1am onwards. My body manages to sleep through the pain for as long as it can but once my drug induced sleep wears off my body then has to try and let me sleep naturally – it is sh*t at this! The pain is just too much.

I check my phone to see what time it is, then usually let out a sarcastic sigh of ‘yay!’ to myself and begin to gather my pillows, blankets, phone and other crap before creeping downstairs while trying not to disturb my lovely wife and stepchildren as they sleep blissfully.

Once I get downstairs I set up camp on the sofa; after another fistful of tablets, a snack and a drink, and lots of faffing with getting comfty it’s time for the big decision; do I watch something mildly monotonous like good old corrie (it’s a cracker for familiar background noise) or do I select something I really want to watch but I’m unlikely to fall asleep to if or when my pain becomes a little more bearable??

Being awake through the night gives you a lot of time to think, right now I’m comfty under my blankets, corrie is on in the background, my pain is gradually lessening to a bearable level but it’s 5:30 am, I’ve been up for a couple of hours n whether I get any more sleep or not I’ve got to be up in a couple of hours for the joys of the morning school run.

Living with MS is odd, often people cannot see the disability but what people really seem to know nothing about is how you have to learn to just accept and live with the unpredictable and draining lifestyle that comes with it. If like me you have become used to having to just power through each day to get to the next then crack on and NEVER GIVE UP!

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